I Exist

Now, here’s something else that’s been nagging at po’ little ol’ me!

I exist!

Sure you do! That’s what you’re saying, right? You’re thinking… okay, the woman has finally lost it. She’s making a point of letting us know she exists. Poor thing!

Naw, I’m good. I ain’t lost it. I’m just sayin’ - I exist. More importantly, I’m saying I want to continue to exist. See… I’ve bought into the whole idea of eternal life and the immortality of the soul and I - like Darius told Nina in "Love Jones"… I Want Mine!

There. I said it. I Want To Go On... like Celine sang when the ship was sinkin' in "Titanic"!

I’m telling anybody who’ll listen that I’m no drop in the ocean.

Drop in the ocean?

Don’t interrupt. Hear me out!

See, there are people out there who’ll tell you that you are just a drop in the ocean. They’ll tell you that your ultimate purpose, your final goal is to eventually rejoin the cosmic oneness of God. Now, I’m not arguing that point. I do believe that it is from God that we came and it is to God that we will return. Yes, God is our final destiny. I truly believe that.

What I’m having a problem with is the drop in a bucket theory. I’m having trouble accepting the idea that my identity, memories, talents, and personality will be swallowed whole into some cosmic One. I keep asking myself - Where would I be? I keep coming back with the disturbing answer that I would no longer be. Nope. I’m not happy with that thought. Like I said…

I’ve bought into the whole idea of eternal life and the immortality of the soul and I - like Darius in Love Jones… I Want Mine!

Here’s to existing!

Just Gimme The Truth

I’ve had a few discussions about the nature of truth. I often walk away from these little thinkfests certain that there is no one single truth, and there is no one reality.

You see it looks like truth is based on your experience, so it changes and can differ from person to person. Yes, I can buy this as long as I don’t think too hard. But if I get ta chewin’ on the idea of multi-levels of reality, I get queasy.

Why? Well, because these “there is no absolute truth” thoughts lead to the idea that there must be many contradicting truths and realities. And I do not do contradictions. I like my shyt cut and dry. All this abstract ruminating might be fascinating, but I gotta say it makes me uncomfortable.

Look, I won’t lie… I can accept my truth as being true, but I’m just not gonna simply accept yours - at least not when you’re a$$ is dead wrong. See what I’m saying?

All right, before I get all nervous about all these possible instabilities and muti-layered realities and contradicting truths let me try to just get practical.

Okay, practically speaking, if someone could promise me a single truth, what difference would it make? Hmmmm... It would make an important difference. I like stability and I don’t want to live in a world where truth is whatever we want it to be. Gimme an absolute and let me sit my butt down.

Here's to somebody's version of the truth being right!

Conversations With God, hmmmm?

In a comment on my previous post a reader recommended I check out Neal Donald Walsch.

I did a bit of spelunking and found that Walsch's philosophy is summed up on his website. Apparently, his message can be reduced to four basic ideas:

1. We are all one.
2. There's enough.
3. There's nothing we have to do.
4. Ours is not a better way, ours is merely another way.

Interesting!

I was taken aback when I stumbled on this entry in Walsch’s Blog:

Well, Conversations with God says that life has no purpose, save the purpose we give it. That's the beauty and the wonder of it. God has not sent us here and told us what to do. God has sent us here and said, You tell me what you want to do. But make it good. Because out of what you decide, you define yourself. Every act is an act of self-definition. We are a piece of divine art in the making. We are creating ourselves, even as we go. On the fly, as it were.

Something about this statement doesn’t sit right with me. Just last night I was talking to Jedi about the idea of self. He was sharing his belief that Satan is all about the self… self-promotion, self-centeredness. Walsch’s discussion of self-definition, self-creation took me back to my conversation with Jedi.

The writer’s insistance that life has no purpose other than the one we give it is suspect. I’m just not buying the thought that the only meaning there is is the one we provide. I believe that God created us with a purpose beyond anything we could have created for ourselves.

As I continued my spelunking, I came across a very cutting criticism of Walsch and his philosophy. Marcia Montenegro concludes that:

(Walsch’s) messages do line up consistently and completely with the messages of someone we know from Genesis chapter 3 — someone who questioned God’s Word, called God a liar, told Adam and Eve that they could be like God, and that they would not die. This someone was the serpent, also known as Satan. In fact, the attacks on Christ, on salvation by grace, on marriage and the family, on God’s Word, on the body, on absolute truth, on the reality of heaven, hell and the devil, and the promotion of sorcery and Gnostic philosophies are a perfect picture of what Satan would say and would want us to believe.

If truly dictated by a spiritual being, this book is a thinly veiled attempt by Satan to sound like God, misquoting Scripture and twisting everything around. Typical of Satan, the ideas are complicated, contradictory and open-ended, and the answers are often evasive. Preaching love and the "highest" choices and thoughts — this is an angel of light (2 Cor. 11:14) sweet-talking us into believing we are God and can do anything we want to do. However, Satan tips his hand too often; his hostility to Christ and his constant attacks on God’s Word give him away.

Conversations with God? Actually, this book is just the opposite.

My investigation has me curious. I think I’ll read one of Neal Donald Walsch’s books and decide for myself if he’s got it right, or if he’s just another New Ager who’s confused about who’s who.

Here's to God being God!

Me and My Religion

I’ve often been put off by the “show” of church and have longed to be a part of a community dedicated to worship, study, and action without all the hoopla! Of course, I don’t question the sincerity of people who “need” to approach God from this place. In many ways, I recognize it as a result of the “entertainment” driven society we live in. Some well-meaning people just don’t seem to understand. Perhaps they don’t yet have the ability to go deeper than a few up-tempo songs and animated, repetitive preaching styles. Fortunately, I also believe that God will meet each of us where we are and lead us where He will.

I have a few favorite preachers. People I believe have helped me develop. If Joyce Meyer had a fan club, I’d join. That’s a strange thing to say… I know, but I really admire that woman. I’ve been warned not to get into the man/woman, but the message. I wholeheartedly agree with that. It is true that following behind a person is dangerous. People can’t be trusted. But again I say that God will deal with that. God can use popular, powerful preachers (even horribly flawed ones) to draw people to him, and I believe that he does just that.

Christians, like any person attempting to live by an ethical code are often accused of hypocrisy. And the accusation is frequently justified. Face it; we all have a bit of hypocrite in us, don’t we? A hidden self that we’d prefer no one else saw. For some of us, that self is so well hidden that we don’t even see it... don’t even acknowledge its influence over the things we say, do, and think. However, if we are truthful we can’t deny its existence. All we can do is take it to God, pray to be changed, trust, and then follow him as best we can.

Not that long ago someone wrote me a rather long email explaining his views on religion. In it he said:

I love the word ability which means the life of Holiness that God commands us to live he also lets us know it is possible and enables us to live it by the dumanis that he wants to put in us. This word dumanis Paul chose for power means it has nothing to do with our strength or ability or any other human means but an inner strengthening and ability that comes from the Lord.

I didn't agree with many of the things this gentleman wrote, however I liked what he was trying to say about the use of the word “ability”! Yes, God enables us… gives us the ability to live Godly lives. However, I’m not sure that means that we can live sin-free. I think what it means is that we can do what is suggested in Micah… love justice, be merciful, and walk humbly with God.

I am a fairly complex woman… a thinker, yes, even a worrier. In the past, I’ve cluttered up my mind with all kinds of details that did little to lead me to, or help me understand what God was trying to reveal to me. It wasn’t until I allowed myself to focus on what I’ve come to think of as the big three – justice, mercy, and humility that I began to grow. And truthfully, as my Jedi has been quick to tell me, if I do a good job with those things, I’ve done just about all I can do! More importantly, I’ll feel like I’m doing what I’ve been called to do…

AND WHAT DOES HE REQUIRE OF US? Justice, mercy, and humility!

It is with a certain degree of simplicity that I approach the Word! Jesus preached in parables… simple stories with profound messages. When I study the bible, I try to remember that. I look for the message and try not to get too caught up in the details. Personally, I believe it keeps me away from false doctrine and religiosity. To me God’s message is a simple one… Love God, Love yourself, and Love your neighbor. Sometimes I think doing that will draw more people to God than all the preaching in the world. You feel me?

Vacation Plan Update

It’s getting clooooooser! Three weeks and yes, I’m counting the days. I just got off the phone with my Delta-workin’ girl cousin and the “Buddy” pass is all lined up! I’ll be able to fly round trip for a mere $170.00 (on expedia.com the lowest fares are over $500.00). I’d say I owe my darlin’ cousin a big thank you and a little giftie! 'Scuze me while I check out Scented Monkey… the girl does like a nice perfume!

This vacation is really a blessing. Besides the deeply discounted airfare, I'm going to be a guest at a family friend's Bed and Breakfast. It sits on a cliff overlooking the ocean. I'm hoping to take quality photographs that she might like to use in her advertising. Other than taking pictures and hiking I don't have any real plans for my time. I just want a change of scenery, ya know? Just a little break from the grind.

Here's to my getaway!

If You Weren't In Crash...

This Is What I Call A Dress!

I don't usually go ga-ga over clothes, but I absolutely love the dress Jennifer Lopez wore to the Academy Awards. I'm posting pictures of the gown on my blog, because you never know when you'll get to present an Oscar.

All I Gotta Say Is...

You know it's hard out here for a pimp
When he tryin to get this money for the rent
For the Cadillacs and gas money spent
Because a whole lot of @#$%^&* talkin *&^%
Will have a whole lot of @#$%^&* talkin *&^%

In my eyes I done seen some crazy thangs in the streets
Gotta couple *&#$ workin on the changes for me
But I gotta keep my game tight like Kobe on game night
Like takin from a *& don't know no better, I know that ain't right
Done seen people killed, done seen people deal
Done seen people live in poverty with no meals
It's (*&^%$ up where I live, but that's just how it is
It might be new to you, but it's been like this for years
It's blood sweat and tears when it come down to this *&^%
I'm tryin to get rich 'fore I leave up out this @#$%^
I'm tryin to have thangs but it's hard fo' a pimp
But I'm prayin and I'm hopin to God I don't slip, yeah

Man it seems like I'm duckin dodgin bullets everyday
%$99&* hatin on me cause I got, *&#$ on the tray
But I gotta stay paid, gotta stay above water
Couldn't keep up with my *&#$, that's when *&^% got harder
North Memphis where I'm from, I'm 7th Street bound
Where %$99&* all the time end up lost and never found
Man these girls think we prove thangs, leave a big head
They come hopin every night, they don't end up bein dead
Wait I got a snow bunny, and a black girl too
You pay the right price and they'll both do you
That's the way the game goes, gotta keep it strictly pimpin
Gotta have my hustle tight, makin change off these women, yeah

It's hard out here for a censor
from Army Archerd's Blog

The nominated tune "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp" from "Hustle & Flow" with music and lyric by Jordan Houston ("Juicy Jay"), Cedric Coleman ("Freysier Boy") and Paul Beauregard ("Deejay Paul") has, by my count, 10 repeated words which would not pass network clearances. They are "fuck," "shit" and "niggaz."

Producer Gil Cates says when he informed the trio that those words would have to be changed, they immediately told him they'd alter 'em. Meanwhile, Cates said "bitch" and "ho's" are ok since they're already heard on network shows.

Here's to ummmm... Best Original Song!

I'ma Talk About Shopping, Too!

I noticed that a lot of my favorite Lady Bloggers talk about shopping. Well, heck... I shop... sometimes. As a matter of fact, I went out and purchased a few things today. So there!

I picked up a new messenger bag for my daughter. I brought her a matching purple leather wallet to hold her well-deserved credit card and checkbook. I took my mother to lunch. I got my daughter some hair accessories. I snagged a piece of fudge that my mom was quick to tell me contained an entire day’s calories. And then... and then... and then I walked by the fine jewelry counter and lost my mind.

I'm a bauble lover. Unfortunately, I'm allergic to metal. Anything that touches my skin must be gold. A belt buckle that brushes against my belly will create a raised itchy red rash, so costume jewelry is a no-no. For a long time, I couldn’t afford the good stuff and had to go without. No watch, no earrings, no necklaces, no bracelets. No bling.

During my second year in college my parents gave me my first real piece of jewelry - a strand of pearls with a delicate gold clasp that they picked up in Morocco. I still wear them. Somewhere along the line I got a simple pair of small gold hoop earrings. When I was married my husband gave me a lovely gold band with gorgeous channel set diamonds. I eventually was able to buy myself a gold watch. It took me six months of layaway payments, but I was finally able to stop asking passing strangers if they had the time. Three years ago, I got a large monetary award at work and I used it to take a solo cruise and buy two diamond bracelets, a gold herringbone bracelet, and a heavy gold chain duty free. I was set. Until I got my hair cut short and fell in love with big earrings.

I’m a collector at heart and artsy gold earrings are one of my passions. My collection is still small, but it’s growing. Once every few months I treat myself. So when that jewelry counter called my name I responded, “Why the 'ell not!”

Here's to finding a really cool $485.00 pair of earrings at %50 off!

Oscar Night

I'm going to watch the award show tonight for the first time in forever. I've promised a certain bloggin' celebrity nut that I'd watch Terrance sing the "it's so hard to be a piiiiimp" song. Lawd, have mercy! Anyway, just in case this award show is as dull as it has been in the past I'm considering letting the M&M's entertain me! Wanna play along?




Here's to M&M's the official candy of the Oscars... I guess!